Halloween

    Today is Halloween and it’s not my year to be with the kids. I know it’s not a great big holiday like Christmas so it shouldn’t be such a big deal, but it is. You see, for many years I did this day alone. Daddy always had to work on Halloween. There’s a part of me that feels like I earned this day. I know that sounds selfish.  It’s not like he had a choice and would probably have rather been trick or treating with the kids, sneaking a Reese’s out of someone’s pillowcase of candy while I sipped my wine and handled out handfuls of candy.  I think I can remember one or two years where he had the evening off…every other year I ended up a stressed and frazzled trying to hastily feed the kids, get them in costumes, and get the designated trick or treating route covered while simultaneously trying to be home to hand out candy.

    I know it seems like I would want to enjoy this year off considering all that doing Halloween alone takes out of me. It's hard because I  know these kids won’t be trick or treating for much longer. My daughter, who once toddled from door to door as a cute little kitty in a sparkly purple tutu is now wearing her pre-teen wannabe Disney Descendants costume complete with blue hair and black leather boots.  My middle child has a couple of years left to trick or treat with us before he ditches us for friends as his older brother has already done.  We won’t get this time back and memories are often only triggered by the photos we take.

    Tonight I’ll hang out with girlfriends, drink a little wine and try not to eat too much chocolate. I’m sure it will be a blast. Still,  I would rather be stuffing a slice of pizza in my mouth, heading out the door in a hurry and cleaning blue hair spray off my hands. I would rather have sore feet at the end of the night and be holding my daughter’s way too heavy pillowcase overloaded with candy. I would rather be tucking 3 crazy sugar crashing kids in at the end of the night.

Ideally, I would settle for stopping by their dad's , walking them to a couple houses and giving them hug goodnight. Unfortunately life is not always ideal.

Today is Halloween. The kids will make memories and I will be grateful for three healthy kids that can share those memories with me...tomorrow.